


i'm the lock; i found the keys

by riverbed



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Anxiety, Bondage, Dialogue Heavy, Dirty Talk, Foot Jobs, Forced Orgasm, Multi, Multiple Orgasms, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Phone Sex, Polyamory, Porn with Feelings, Romance, Threesome - M/M/M, poly dynamics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-28
Updated: 2016-11-28
Packaged: 2018-09-02 17:44:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8676832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/riverbed/pseuds/riverbed
Summary: john doesn't know why he's so anxious over being alone with lafayette.it's an adjustment, but he'll get there.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [one_golden_sun](https://archiveofourown.org/users/one_golden_sun/gifts).



> this is set in one golden sun's [poly trio universe](http://archiveofourown.org/series/550474).  
> happy birthday! i love you! enjoy!
> 
> there is a lot of porn here. lol.
> 
> there's a subplot involving less-than-minor character death but it's not a terribly emotional thing.

Alex was maternal to a fault. John would tease him about it, but he was too busy being anxious.

He had kissed each of them goodbye at least twice by this point, and he was still in the house, mulling over the options presented by the frankly obscene amount of food he’d pre-cooked for them and their set pre- FaceTime call schedule, which he’d pinned to the fridge with a magnet that was the shape of South Carolina. John sat on the counter, and made meaningful eye contact with Lafayette, who was leaning against the dishwasher, opposite him. Lafayette smirked.

“Alexander,” John said, and Alex stopped short, surprised that John would use his full name.

“What is it?” Alex hissed, a bit on edge; and Lafayette laughed, softly, affectionately. He went over to Alex and laid his forearms on his shoulders, answering in John’s stead.

“Darling,” he said, very seriously, holding Alex’s gaze steady and locked to his own, “we will be fine. John and I are perfectly capable adults.”

Alex scoffed without missing a beat. “I took both of you in as stray party boys.” But he leaned up and pecked Lafayette on the cheek, then stepped back and looked at John mournfully. He sighed. “Fine,” he said, and came over to John once more, wrapped his arm around his waist. “C’mere,” he told him, muffled against John’s shoulder; John rubbed his back as Alex squeezed him tight. “Love you,” Alex said. John kissed the top of his head.

“I love you too.” He nudged Alex so he could look at him. “Don’t worry about us, okay? We’ll survive two weeks without you.”

Alex paid him a doubting look. “It’s a little longer than that.”

“I’m hoping for a miracle.”

Alex rolled his eyes. “We’ll see. Lafayette, darling,” he said, stepping out of John’s orbit; John resisted the urge to reach out and grab him again, feeling as if he was slipping through his fingers for the last time, completely irrational. “Take care of him,” he stage-whispered as he and Lafayette walked toward the front door together. John watched him as he gathered up his weekend bag, his backpack, and tried not to think about how much care he’d need.

 

* * *

 

When they next spoke, Alex was, predictably, on the beach.

“It’s not the prettiest inlet in Scotland, apparently, even on a good day,” Alex said as he finished panning his phone camera around to show him the bay, “which, thank god. But it’s the ocean.”

John brought his legs up into the chair to sit criss-cross. He grinned. “It’s kind of gray out for summer.”

“I knooooow," Alex whined. “I swear, Scots have a skewed idea of what warm weather is. I had to go and buy some sweaters!”

“How are you, besides cold?” John asked, skating his fingers over the desktop. He was antsy; he wished he could reach out and touch Alex on the screen. The image of him was too small, he couldn’t smell him, couldn’t see the texture of his skin or the exact color of his eyes; he was too far away.

“Lonely,” Alex answered honestly, to John’s perverted relief. God, what was _wrong_ with him if he _wanted_ his boyfriend to be lonely? “I miss you guys. I’m trying to get everything situated with the estate, which is larger than I’d estimated, as fast as I can, but it’s a pain in the ass. Last I talked to James, he said as a joke that our dad probably owned a couple castles. It’s starting to look like he was about right, at least as far as actual gross wealth goes.”

“At least you’ll never have to work again and now you can sit around and get fat with me. We’ll never leave the house.”

Alex’s glare could be felt even through the sterility of John’s MacBook screen. “You know me better than that. I’d get bored. Plus, I’d take being home with you two over inheriting any of this. You know how weird this situation is for me.”

“Of course,” John said, suddenly meek again, “I’m sorry.” He felt like he’d overstepped his bounds. An absent parent, let alone who’d spurned so many relationships in his absence that he’d had nobody left to tend to his estate when he died besides the younger of his two estranged-since-birth sons, was certainly something unfamiliar to John. If anything, he’d grown up smothered with attention, though not necessarily appreciated. And he felt like he was far less well-adjusted than Alex was, and definitely far less tough. He wondered what that said about him.

“Hey,” Alex said gently, “’s fine.” John looked back at him; he hadn’t realized he’d stopped. Alex met his eyes with a grin, his cheeks pushing up into the frames of his sunglasses, and John couldn’t help but smile back.

Alex tactfully changed the subject. “Is Laf up yet?”

“You know that boy.” John glanced at the clock at the top of his screen. “He won’t get up for another hour or so. Sorry you missed him.”

“It’s cool,” Alex said. “It’s nice to have the chance to talk to you by yourself. It’s funny - I feel like we’ve talked more one-on-one the past couple days than we have since we first started dating.”

John blushed. “Yeah.” He looked at the clock again. He was out of things to say. “I’m gonna go get some food. I love you.”

“Love you too. I’m gonna go… fuck around on this beach, I guess. Dad’s lawyer has gone home for the evening. He lives in Glasgow so he tries not to stay out on the coast too late.”

“That’s good. Gives you the chance to explore.”

“Yeah! This town is little, but cute. I like it. Some of the shops and stuff are still open.”

“Have fun,” John said, and Alex blew him a kiss, which he mimed catching in his fist, laughing. He shut the laptop when Alex had hung up, and moseyed into the kitchen to pour himself some cereal. As much as Alex had fussed over them, he’d been right to do so; Lafayette could only make fancy meals that required an hour or more of time invested into them, and John was hopeless at everything but Kraft.

He sat down at the table last Sunday’s newspaper; Alex had nearly finished the crossword. He filled in the few remaining clues as he munched on his breakfast, and tried to decide whether or not he wanted to be around when Lafayette woke up. John generally liked to run around this time in the morning, when the neighborhood was still quiet, but he was also feeling like he needed closeness in this time of the strange absence of one of his boyfriends. Ultimately deciding the best course of action would be to stick to his routine, and that exercise would do his mood some good, he changed into his running shorts and pulled his hair back after washing his dishes and headed down to put a couple miles in. Just a quick few laps, and then he’d feel better.

Working out was innate. A built-in coping mechanism, something immediate to demand his attention, stray it away from his feelings. He focused his vision straight ahead, the familiar sign on the next block, the pigeons that flew across his path. The only decision he had to make was whether or not to turn the upcoming corner and cut through the park. He opted for going the long way around some more buildings, the corner store and coffee shop.

By the time he looped back to the apartment, he’d put in about four miles but felt like he’d run twenty. He collapsed on the sofa with a glass of ice water, panting. Lafayette wandered out with the cat in his arms and sat beside him, and they regarded each other silently for a moment.

“It is odd,” Lafayette finally said, “the house feels too quiet.”

John rested his head against the curve of the back of the couch, shut his eyes. “Yeah,” he said at length, “I know what you mean.”

“Let’s go and do something today. Lunch, shopping. My treat.”

John groaned. “I don’t know, Lafayette.” The truth was, the few one-on-one outings he’d been on with Lafayette were brief prefaces to meeting up with Alex - essentially carpooling to dates that took place between all three of them. Alex was sort of the pivot point of their relationship - John wouldn’t know Lafayette if not for him, and he adored him, but there was an awkward space between them without Alex to liaise.

But Lafayette seemed oblivious to his inner turmoil. He had adjusted on the couch, sitting against the arm with his legs stretched out across John’s lap, petting the cat, which rested, content, on his stomach, purring. His face was open and he wore a sleepy smile - John suddenly knew just what he wanted to do all day. He squirmed and shimmied until he could wedge himself between Lafayette and the back of the couch, selfishly shoving the little white cat off her perch. Laf grunted and batted at John’s arm, grumbling that John was sweaty from his run but scooting over just enough to make slightly more room for him. John put his face in his shoulder, breathed out against his neck, and felt Lafayette’s stubble against his lips.

“Let’s just stay here,” he said quietly, and Lafayette sighed, chuckled, reached up and grabbed a blanket from where it was draped over the back of the couch - the last thing John registered before he fell asleep was the sharpness of the cat’s claws as she happily kneaded the back of his thigh.

 

* * *

 

Saturday evening was usually when they’d all spend time together, dinner and shopping or something. As it stood, they had been so comfortable all day that the only movement they’d elected to do was to the guest bedroom - John had grumbled over retiring to the master, and tactfully Lafayette had not pressed the issue. He was kissing him, still some space between the two of them kneeling up facing each other on the bed. John kissed back, but it felt strange - he never thought he’d feel incomplete without some performance added to kissing somebody, but not having Alex there to watch them was weird. He put a hand on Lafayette’s thigh and squeezed, letting Laf hold him by his other wrist and take control, hoping it would flood out his anxiety. This could be something good, yes, something pleasurable and it’d knock him out for the best night’s sleep he’d had since Alex had left - but he always felt lost in New York without Alex, always felt out of his depth, overwhelmed by the bright lights and loud noises and overall _bigness_ of it all and by -

“Lafayette,” he squeaked, surprised by his own voice. He pulled back, distantly aroused but swimming in a confused haze, his palm flat on Lafayette’s chest to force some distance between them. Realizing his hesitance, Lafayette dropped his wrist, and John leaned back on his knees, circled it with the fingers of his other hand and absently rubbed at the veins. Lafayette studied him, his head tilted; he seemed to be looking into John and trying to make out some grand conclusion, but he ended up just making a noncommittal noise and backing off. John shuddered out a relieved breath and tried to gather himself, tried to figure out where to go from here. He felt humiliated. His mind had, once again, gotten in the way of something that could have been fun, spoiled it for everyone. He flopped down, face in his pillow, and listened to Lafayette’s movements shift around the room as he tempered his breathing.

He didn’t realize he’d drifted off until Lafayette was next to him again, this time on his other side; he was sitting on the bed behind him, hand at rest on his shoulder. “Mon amor?” he said softly, and he brought his hand up to play a bit with John’s hair; John snuffled and buried his nose further into his pillow.

“I’m so sorry, love,” Lafayette said. And he sounded it.

That was about all John could take. He bolted upright, startling Lafayette; he drew his hand back to avoid pulling John’s hair. “Would you quit being so damn _accommodating?”_ he whined.

He could practically see Lafayette’s pupils narrow. Still, he was cautious when responding. “What do you mean?” John wanted to slap him, try to get him to snap out of it.

“Make me stop moping! Why are you being so _nice_ to me? Why aren’t you forcefully distracting me from my mood like you normally do, being silly and making plans?”

Lafayette laid out across the bed, propping his elbow up so he could rest his head on his hand and stare John down. “I thought it best you be left alone on this one, pet.”

“The last thing I want is to be left alone.” John scrubbed his hand down his face and groaned; this wasn’t what he’d wanted, what he’d meant. Why was he so bad at communicating? “Look, I’m sorry,” he said. Lafayette was looking at him mildly, his expression expectant, open. Even through John’s outburst he remained infuriatingly sweet. “I just don’t know how to deal with this. With Alex here, everything is so smooth, and with you and me - I just don’t know how this works,” he admitted, and slumped back against the headboard miserably.

Lafayette smiled. “You don’t know how this works?” he said, and, careful not to crowd John, tipped his face toward him to overtake his mouth in a slow kiss.

When he pulled away, flushed, he said softly, “Could’ve fooled me, mon ami.”

John covered his face with his hands. His face was hot to the touch, which just made him feel more embarrassed. He _wanted_ to fuck Lafayette, he wanted to be sexy and relaxed and _get over this._ He was so _mad_ at himself over not being able to.

But Lafayette seemed to have given the subject up. He dropped his hand from John’s face but kept his other on his knee, gave him an affectionate squeeze. “You just have to let me know what you need, John,” he said quietly, and it made John’s heart flip painfully in his chest. “Whatever you need and I’ll give it to you.”

Lafayette left him there to stew it over on the bed, and as soon as John heard the front door close he slammed his head back against the wall, brought a pillow to his face, and screamed.

 

* * *

 

He stayed in the guest room that night. John pretended to be asleep when Lafayette returned home and peeked around the door - silver of light from the slight opening until he sighed and shut it again. He didn’t feel worthy of their shared bed.

He fished his phone out of the jeans he’d discarded on the floor. He googled GMT, because in all the hubbub surrounding this trip he’d been unable to retain the time difference - 6:06 am. Alex was unlikely to be awake, knowing him. but John was too wired to sleep, so he opened their text message conversation, the one way they talked in private. It had last been used to coordinate Christmas gifts; shows how often they needed it. It was now May.

 _I don’t know if I can do this,_ John typed, and then deleted it, because that was too dramatic, too sad. What he ended up sending instead was _I miss you._

Alex’s dots appeared right away, which was shocking. John hoped he wouldn’t have to wait for him to write him an essay, as was usually the case.

 _You doing ok?_ Alex was so good at reading him, but John supposed that sending him a message out of the blue was sort of a red flag.

 _I’ll be fine,_ he replied, _I’m just having a hard time adjusting._

He immediately cursed himself for even now not being able to explain that he wasn’t really all right, for not being honest about his feelings. It was so reflexive for him to dismiss his own needs - appease others, make them more comfortable. For all the work he’d done to change that for the small stuff, when it came to the things that really mattered, he’d still gladly shove his true feelings away for the sake of Alex being able to enjoy his trip.

 _I love you,_ he texted before Alex could, and Alex must have deleted what he had been typing because all he sent back was the nerd emoji.

 _Why are you awake,_ he said, and Alex called him.

“Hey,” he said, trying to make it sound like he hadn’t been crying.

“Hey,” Alex responded, and his voice was soft and sweet and made John want to cry all over again. “I just woke up, since you were wondering. I’ve been getting up early in the mornings and walking the beach with the dog.”

John snorted. “The hotel has a dog?”

“Mm, ‘hotel’ is a bit of a stretch. This is more of a… bed and breakfast.”

“You really couldn’t have stayed in Glasgow?”

“I wanted to be out of the city. If I have to be here, I might as well look at it like a vacation, right?” John nodded, though Alex couldn’t see him. “It’s not that remote. Dad’s lawyer lives like… thirty minutes away with the route he takes out here. He says he doesn’t mind. Besides, it’s kind of interesting to see the places Dad bought property. I have no idea why he chose to invest in a little beach town, but it’s cute. Maybe he wanted to eventually build his own bed and breakfast.”

John laughed at that. “What I know of the man, he wasn’t very hospitable.”

“Don’t I know it.” There was a moment of quiet besides the rustle of bedclothes. “Mm,” Alex said again, and John knew that voice.

“Alexander…” he warned, and Alex hummed, baiting him to elaborate.

“Did you and Lafayette fool around?” Alex asked when John demurred, suddenly shy.

“I…” he trailed off, unsure how to answer. “We didn’t do much. Just kissed and stuff.” He felt suddenly ashamed, like he was telling a lie. But Alex didn’t notice.

“Mm, I should take care of you then.”

One thing about Alex - he was _exceedingly_ persuasive. It was so easy to go along with a harebrained scheme of his; John imagined the upward curl of one side of his lip in his signature smug, lopsided smirk, perhaps hovering over him as he straddled John’s thighs, and he was done for. “Should we switch to video?” John asked shyly.

“No, baby, just this is perfect. God, I love your voice.” Alex adjusted in the covers again, and John listened, thought about his weight shifting in the bed next to him. “What are you thinking about? Talk to me, sweetheart.”

John blushed at Alex using the nickname John usually reserved for him. “You,” he answered truthfully, letting his free hand rest on his stomach through the thin fabric of his t-shirt.

“Yeah?” Alex shot back, and his voice was a little breathy now, tinged with the most gorgeous grain. “What about me?”

John closed his eyes and let his mind wander. “Your… hair. Pushing it back from your neck, the little spot behind your ear that makes you make that noise when I kiss there.” Alex gasped, and John laughed. “Yeah. That one.”

“God, I love you,” Alex groaned, and John hummed, considering. “Thinking of your back, of you stripped and bent over your desk, arching for me.”

“Oh,” Alex challenged, though there was practically no bite left in his speech, “you want to bend me over my own desk, huh?”

“Yeah,” John said. In his mind he let his fingers trail down the knobs of Alex’s spine, pausing at the small of his back where he saw it dipped so his belly would touch the surface of the desk. “Holding your wrists…” he flexed his palm, gripping Alex’s wrists behind his back. All invisible, intangible. “As I use the other hand to touch you, work you open, make you beg.”

“I don’t beg,” Alex protested.

“You would,” John promised, and Alex moaned, the softest, most desperate little sound John had ever heard. “Oh, baby, you keep making noises like that, you’re gonna make it hard for me to deny you. But it’d be so rewarding.” His hand trailed down his abdomen to palm at himself through his shorts, and he knew he was behind but he didn’t care - he wanted to keep Alex in whatever strange bed he was in all day, prove that even halfway across the world he could claim him. There was this weird, primal instinct bubbling up in him - normally he was pretty submissive, and he knew how much Alex loved to top him, and he loved that, too, but he was feeling possessive, something not quite unfamiliar but at the moment completely untamed.

No, he wanted to be patient, wanted Alex to be patient for him. “Stop touching yourself,” he told Alex, and he heard him gasp again.

“John,” Alex whined. There was the shift of skin against sheets again, this time a little more frantic.

John ignored it. “Are you being good?” he bit out, harsh.

Alex whimpered, and at first it sounded like he was just going to say John’s name again, but then he head him swallow and correct himself. “Yes,” he said.

“Good. Hold onto the headboard or something, and just listen.” John cleared his throat as he pushed his shirt up, trailing his nails down his stomach in a ghosting of how Alex would dig his in and scratch. “I want to wreck you,” he told Alex, and Alex started a moan but John didn’t let the quiet hang for long enough to hear it. “I want to throw all your useless work on the floor and put you over your desk, tie your wrists together so I don’t have to worry about you trying to weasel your way out of it. I can hold you down with one hand -” he imagined said hand between Alex’s shoulder blades, spanning the gap - “and play with your cute little ass until you beg me to fuck you, then I’d drop to my knees and eat you out until you cry. Make you come a couple times with just my tongue and hands, you like that, baby?”

If the moan he let it out was any indication, Alex definitely did like it. “Shh,” John chided him, “you’ll wake up your fellow guests. Do you want them to know you’re being a desperate little slut?”

Alex’s noises quieted to soft whispers of want, of John’s name, and John continued. “When your body’s so exhausted that all you can do is beg me to untie you and stop…” he said darkly, and he could hear Alex’s breath hitch; he let him wait as he snaked a hand into his boxer briefs to feel his own hot cock in his hand, fully hard. He hissed as he squeezed himself before remembering he had a yarn to spin.

“While you’re busy _whining_ ,” he continued viciously, “I’ll sit down in your desk chair and make you sit on my lap, ride my thick cock until yours gets hard again. Make you bounce on it, Alex, I’ll make you fuck yourself so hard on my cock. God, I’m so hard for you, babe. I want you so bad.”

Alex sighed his name, shivery and slight. “Can I pl-please touch myself, John?” he asked, sounding broken. John grunted and shoved his waistband down to below his balls.

“No,” he said, “hold on for me, baby. I’m not gonna be touching your pathetic cock while I use you.”

Alex was getting loud again, and this time John let him. He stroked himself in time with Alex’s panting and his high-pitched moans, matching them with his own. He felt frenzy taking him over as he rubbed his palm over the crown of his cock. “God, I’m gonna fuck you so hard when you get home. Remind you who you belong to, that’s right, baby, hold your hips and make you ride my dick until you can’t help but come again, give me every last bit of you without ever touching you. Gonna wear out that dick of yours, use it all up.” John imagined Alex’s thighs shaking as he was forced to lower himself onto his lap again and again and he let out a moan of his own.

“Are you gonna fill me up, John?” Alex must have been feeling a little more clear-headed, or he was so clouded with lust that the words came easily. “I’d beg you for it, for that big fucking load in my ass.” John shuddered; God, Alex could be _filthy_. “Work your dick good inside me until you let me have it.”

“I wouldn’t let you have it,” John countered, squeezing the base of his dick to keep himself in check. “I’d fuck you through another orgasm and make you get down on your knees and service my cock until I came on your pretty face.”

“Oh my god,” Alex gasped. “God, John, that’s so nasty, fuck.”

“Touch yourself for me, baby,” John hissed, “come on, fucking come with me, Jesus - Christ-” the last syllable was higher than John would have ever liked to admit as he blew his load on his hand and stomach, sticky and hot. The unmistakable noise Alex always made when he was close, a low, bitten-on groan, echoed in his head as he squeezed with his forefinger and thumb from base to tip, working the last bits of his release out of himself, his hips bucking in the aftershocks. “Fucking come for me, Alex,” he breathed, “I love you so much.”

“John,” Alex said after a few moments of listening to each other’s breathing, and he sounded muffled; John chuckled and asked if he’d dropped the phone.

“Kind of,” Alex answered. “‘m under the covers.”

“Ah,” John said, and he was so overcome with affection for the man on the other end of the phone line, on the other side of the ocean. “Wish I were under them with you.”

Alex sighed and it sounded so content and happy that John couldn’t bring himself to bring him down with more talk about his pesky feelings. “Thought you were the resident dog walker now,” he teased, and Alex laughed.

“The dog can figure it out himself. He does his beach thing every day anyway, with or without me.”

“You should come home,” John said, and he winced. He’d told himself he wasn’t going to get all mopey, damn it!

But Alex said, “I will soon,” without missing a beat, and it was enough, in John’s haze of freshly satisfied lust, to assuage his guilt and anxiety. He told Alex he loved him again, hung up the phone, and thought of Alex on a gray-skied beach as he fell asleep.

 

* * *

 

John woke up to the sound and smell of bacon sizzling. “Mon amour?” Lafayette said; he was letting light in with the door ajar again, no doubt trying not to infringe on John’s rest if he truly needed it. John took advantage of being hidden by the down comforter to check his phone and, upon realizing it was 11am, threw the blanket back and stared at Lafayette.

“Sorry,” he said, looking around for his jeans. Lafayette made an amused face and pushed the door open further, letting light from the hallway pour into the room and fully illuminate it; the blinds were always down in here, as it was usually where Alex would go to rest if he got a headache.

Lafayette plopped a small stack of clothes onto John’s lap; black jeans, a fresh t-shirt, a pair of trunks on top. “I could bring you your breakfast in bed, too, if you want, but I made plans for us today, if you wish to stop being so lazy.” John knew he was being playful, but he could also feel the slight tension under it; he’d been worried. John had made him worry.

He swallowed down the guilt. “No, I’ll… be right out.” He watched Lafayette leave and then scrambled to get dressed, not wanting to keep him waiting. Five minutes later he entered the kitchen to find a short stack of buttermilk pancakes waiting for him, alongside a pile of scrambled eggs and two strips of bacon. Butter and syrup were next to a glass of apple juice; John let his mouth drop open.

“Do you know they make mixes for this now?” Lafayette said, indicating his own pancakes. “And here I thought cooking had to be complicated.”

“Are we managing to domesticate you?” John teased. He poured syrup all over his plate; he’d inhale the sugar juice constantly if he could. Alex must have ratted him out to Lafayette - he couldn’t remember revealing his weakness for breakfast food.

Lafayette shook his head, his curls tumbling. “Hardly, love. Not to worry. Or, well… I suppose we could make some arrangement where I wear an apron, if you will wear a maid’s outfit.” He punctuated this with a wink, and before John could cut a square of pancake to toss at him he had turned back to the stove to put another egg on for himself.

John munched on his breakfast, swinging his legs under the counter bar where they couldn’t quite touch the floor. They watched each other while they ate, Lafayette leaning against the counter. Finally, John broke the silence by asking what they were doing with their afternoon.

“It is up to you, amour,” Lafayette said. “I thought I might take you to the zoo, but if there’s soemthing you prefer to do…”

“Zoo, please!” John hopped up from the counter. “I’m done!” he declared. As old as he got, John still felt like a kid upon mention of a place he could go and see animals, and it’s not like he’d been deprived as a child; his nanny had taken him and his younger brothers to the aquarium all the time. It was a favorite weekend outing. But he loved the Bronx zoo, with its mix of old buildings and strange natural elements, wedging themselves into an urban landscape wherever they could fit.

Lafayette was grinning at him. “Excellent. It will give us the chance to get some fresh air and talk.” He grabbed his jacket, and tossed John a zip-up hoodie; John followed him out to the car, somewhat dumbstruck, wondering what he’d gotten himself into.

 

* * *

 

It turned out Lafayette didn’t force him to _talk_ for the duration of the day. John thoroughly enjoyed the zoo; he remarked to Lafayette that he wished the red panda would come a little bit closer so he could hug it. On the way home, they had dinner at the tiny Mexican place in Harlem that Alex had introduced them both to and John didn’t feel sad, didn’t feel like anything was missing; he ate his tacos and laughed at Lafayette’s recounting the antics of the birds of prey at the zoo.

“You want another drink?” Lafayette clinked John’s margarita glass with his own.

John leaned back in his chair. “I’m good,” he said. And he did feel good. He’d had two, and so much good food, and he’d had a nice day, a normal date with his boyfriend - even with the other one missing, he suddenly realized. He’d really enjoyed himself, consistently, all day long. Maybe all he needed to do was let Lafayette do what he did best, charm the pants off him.

He was even feeling like he’d let him follow through and take the pants off him.

John pushed his foot forward, nudging Lafayette’s with it. Lafayette startled a bit at first, but then leveled his eyes at him, and John gave him a shit-eating grin. John slid his foot out of his shoe and left it on the floor, hooking the arch behind Lafayette’s leg and dragging it up the length of his calf, then running his toes along his inner thigh when he reached the knee. He could see the way Laf gripped tight to his glass, the way his jaw drew tight as John pushed further toward his crotch. He was enjoying it, this little bit of power he’d taken for himself; the ability to render Lafayette speechless. Whatever dominant streak he’d been on since last night with Alex, he was grateful for it. He could control a situation if the terms were sex. He didn’t have to talk about his innermost desires to be wanted, he just had to play a part.

Lafayette seemed to regain some of his cool, and he reached out and covered John’s hand with his own. He tapped at his wrist twice, just a warning, before backing off to tangle their fingers together; John felt his thumb trace the lines on his palm and shivered a bit, but he kept up with his work under the tablecloth, now pushing the arch of his foot directly into Lafayette’s groin, searching out his cock through his twill pants. Lafayette’s free hand went to cup his ankle, and John suddenly wished they were home doing this, his bare foot on Laf’s naked body, staring into each other’s eyes in the familiar light of their own house and not the barely-disguised fluorescence filtered through gaudy stained glass and the flicker of fake tealights.

As it was, Lafayette’s hand stroked the top of John’s foot through his sock as John raised his free hand to signal the server for their check. He paid and put his shoe back on and tried not to stumble as they stood to leave. Of course, Lafayette was the picture of composure, at least until he locked the car doors around them; the moment that was done, he reached out and gripped the back of John’s neck.

“See what you’ve done to me?” he asked him, shoving John’s face down in his lap. John smiled, nuzzling against his erection, trapped in his soft, worn-in green khakis. Laf hissed and pushed John closer to him, and John reveled in the scent of him, the masculinity of his sweat cut with his body wash and matching, musky cologne. _See what you’ve done to me,_ Lafayette had said. _See what you can do to me. See what power you have?_

John hummed and kept his face in Lafayette’s lap while he drove them home, his knees drawn up into the passenger seat, his side pressed painfully into the center console. He didn’t do anything but breathe against him, air fluttering the hem of his t-shirt against Laf’s belly on his exhales. Lafayette played absently with his hair when he wasn’t shifting, toying with the shorter baby curls at the sensitive back of John’s neck and making him shiver. Lafayette’s stiff cock was wedged up against his cheek and John resisted the urge to turn into it, unzip Lafayette’s pants and work his tongue around him, use some of the confidence coursing through him. But he had a feeling Lafayette had other plans.

The drive home felt like it took forever, but Lafayette finally turned the car off and helped push John up into his seat properly so he could get out. They ascended the stairs and Lafayette fumbled with his keys for only a moment before they were in their door.

Lafayette put a hand on John’s chest and pushed him back, till his knees hit what John knew to be a kitchen chair and he went down, sat hard on the wooden surface. “Gotta teach you a lesson, pet,” Lafayette said, and he stripped John of his t-shirt before he could protest; John panted as he watched Lafayette rip his shirt in half along the side seam, and he spluttered but could do nothing. Lafayette smiled down at him evilly as he coiled the shirt into a rope, then he circled around John, wrenched his hands where he wanted them and tied them securely to the bars in the back of the chair. John craned his neck over his shoulder to look at him and protested weakly some more, but Lafayette shushed him with a quick kiss and told him he didn’t need his hands.

He came back around and stood in front of John, seeming to be waiting for something. John gulped,tried to make himself look coy and innocent; he looked up at Lafayette through his eyelashes and pulled his mouth into a bow-shaped pout. Lafayette’s hands finally went to his fly.

John thought, _the angle isn’t perfect, but I’ll make do,_ but Lafayette didn’t step forward once he’d stripped out of his clothes; he stood there a couple feet away from John, strangely nude in their dark kitchen. John looked at him, hopelessly confused.

“You started something, and I expect you to finish it,” Lafayette said, “or did you need my help getting your socks off, too?”

John flushed bright red as he realized what Lafayette intended him to do. Nonetheless, he curled the toes of one foot and used them pulled the sock off the other, then repeated the action on the other side, then he extended his leg as gracefully as he could to push against Lafayette’s hip. It was an awkward movement, and his legs would get tired like this very fast; but luckily Lafayette seemed to be thinking ahead, and he pulled one of the other kitchen chairs to sit across from John, letting him rest his calf across his leg as he pushed his sole against Lafayette’s still-hard cock. He knew his mouth was agape, a mixture of shock and weirdly-lit arousal, pupils dilated and hair mussed; thinking about his own no doubt helpless appearance excited him, made him squirm even as he watched Lafayette tip his head back and his thick cock jump under his foot. He was still fully clothed himself, and the underside of his straining cock was pushing insistently against the seam of his jeans; it was uncomfortable, but Lafayette was too far gone to care even if John had been able to say anything.

There was such an uncanny electric energy being passed back and forth between them, here in their quiet condo, just the two of them, Lafayette’s fingertips skating across the bones of John’s foot, slightly ticklish, as he flexed his foot against him and made him moan, made him sigh. There was no way this was the best simulation Lafayette had ever had, but his performance, his little _aaah_ s and praise, boosted John’s ego, made him assume he was doing a pretty good job with what he had to work with. And anyway, Alex was always telling him not to be such a prude.

His heel brushed against Lafayette’s balls and he let out a deep moan that shot straight to John’s own dick. He whined, puffing some hair out of his eyes, and tilted his head to study his work at a different angle.

“Oh, please, Lafayette…” he whispered. He hadn’t realized he’d been vocalizing at all - he had been busy watching his partner’s cock jump so beautifully beneath his ministrations - so he was taken by surprise when Lafayette let his foot drop from his lap. John felt slammed back down to earth when his sole hit the cool wood floor, but Lafayette didn’t leave him hanging for long; he growled as he undid the fabric around John’s hands and stood him up, shoving John’s pants down with his underwear before pressing them together chest to chest, thigh to thigh. John moaned and rutted against him, felt his cock, finally freed from the confines of the tight denim, going across Lafayette’s firm abdominals. John wrapped his arms around Laf’s neck and brought him down for a forceful kiss, full of desire and longing and _apology -_ how could he have ever been such an idiot? How could he have let himself miss out on _this?_ \- and Lafayette returned it passionately, gasping into his mouth as John worked his hips against his lover’s.

Lafayette finally broke the kiss, only to spit in his hand and reach between them to wrap them both in it and squeeze and stroke along their length, and John fell apart, scrabbling for a grip on Lafayette’s biceps, and he ended up with then nails of one hand barbed into his arm while he panted against his shoulder, nibbling a little when he could find the presence of mind to do so. Lafayette made such incredible noises this close, grunts and sighs as he climbed closer and closer to climax. John tried to hold on but he ended up coming first, spilling all over Lafayette’s belly and dripping down to coat them both as Lafayette kept stroking them, relentless.

John mewled with overstimulation, and he wriggled to try to get away, but Lafayette was holding him close by a vice grip on his ass and John was too exhausted to put up much of a fight. He succumbed to Lafayette’s attentions once more, gave in and let Laf take exactly what he needed.

Lafayette came with a full-body sigh, John’s name on his lips, and kissed him even as John felt another wave of come pulse from him. He gasped when Laf bit at his lower lip, and he felt him chuckle, good-humored, against him.

“I think we need a shower,” Laf said happily, finally backing off, but giving John’s butt a firm squeeze before he released him.

John looked at the mess on Lafayette’s tummy with some distaste. “Me too,” he said.

 

* * *

 

To his immense disappointment, John’s confidence level plummeted back down without the aid of alcohol in the morning.

He no longer felt confident, or sexy, or powerful. He felt groggy, and anxious, and sad without Alexander, and incompetent for being unable to voice his concerns to Lafayette. He even felt guilty, like he’d led Lafayette on. And he _loved_ this man - that was what was so ridiculous. He loved Lafayette, so much, so independent of Alex, and despite all the fire burning in his heart and soul for him he couldn’t just _tell him that._

It felt like it had tempered out anyway. He felt like he had let Lafayette down, like he’d made a promise and couldn’t keep it. All the nice parts of last night had faded and now he just felt empty.

At least Alex would be back in just two more days, and things could go back to normal.

Lafayette didn’t have to work, and John didn’t feel like going to his loft, so they spent the morning cleaning and on the couch, respectively, John flipping back and forth between cartoons and _Die Hard._ He felt so bad, so deeply guilty for not being good enough, that he didn’t talk to Lafayette at all.

Lafayette called to John for lunch and John heard the rumbling of his own stomach and ignored him. Ten minutes later Lafayette was sitting next to him and turning off the TV. John grumbled, but Lafayette was staring him down.

“What?” John asked miserably.

“We have _got_ to talk about this,” Lafayette said.

John swallowed. “About what?” he said weakly, though even he wasn’t impressed with the level of conviction in his voice.

Lafayette plopped the cat onto John’s lap, and she settled down immediately. John felt disarmed by the warm fuzzies and cuddled her close, using her as a kind of pathetic barrier between himself and Lafayette. He did not want to have this conversation. If there was anything John hated more than being told what to do, it was having to explain himself.

“John,” Lafayette said, and he sighed, rubbed at his temples. “I am so sorry I haven’t been able to ease your worry over Alexander. I have tried, but… you haven’t given me any hints as to what to do. I hope you aren’t too angry with me.”

John’s face fell; he felt his jaw drop in horror. “Oh, no!” he said urgently, kneeling up and dislodging the cat, who made an unhappy noise as she landed on the floor. “I’m not angry with you. And it’s not that I’m _worried_ about Alex, I guess, I just…”

Lafayette’s face softened; he looked up at John from above his palm, resting across his mouth, and said, “Yes?”

John flailed his arms out helplessly. He felt his defenses breaking down the moment they did so, looking into Lafayette’s soft brown eyes. “I just… I don’t know,” he started. “I feel like… without Alex here, you know, since he’s the bridge between us, I just… can’t really talk to you without him.”

Expecting Lafayette to mope, John was shocked when his eyes lit up and he started laughing. “Oh, amour,” he said, “did you ever perhaps think that you can’t talk to me because you’ve never actually tried?”

John spluttered. “Wh-what do you mean?”

“It is simple. You’re just not used to it, love.” Lafayette took John’s hands in his, rested them in his own lap. “Every conversation we’ve had has been through or about Alex. We have to try it out to figure out our own way of communicating. I know you are not the most vocal person, so if that doesn’t work for you, I’m fine with that. But I’d love for you to give me the opportunity to learn. And John,” he said, catching John’s eyes and holding his gaze, “I think you have a misunderstanding about a fundamental point of this relationship.”

John stared at him, opened and closed his mouth like an idiot a couple times before he gave up.

“You seem to assume,” Lafayette continued, “that the only reason we’re together is because of Alexander. I am with you because when I met you I fell in love with you, your smile, your freckles,” here he reached up and pinched one of John’s cheeks, and John batted his hand away, “your sweetness.” He smiled, and John found that he believed it. “Alex isn’t dating us both. I mean, he is, but… I’m dating you too, because I want to, not because Alexander dragged me into it.”

John wanted to curl up into a ball and roll away like a pill bug. That’s how small he felt, how unworthy. Lafayette was absently stroking his knuckles, a big, goofy smile on his face, like everything he’d said was genuine, and all John could do in return was stammer that he was sorry, a pitiful attempt to prove himself. All he wanted to do was prostrate himself at Lafayette’s feet and beg forgiveness but his minute sense of pride only let him let out an apologetic peep and cuddle up into his arms, wrapping his arms around Lafayette’s middle and clinging to him, head on his shoulder, blinking back the tears that forced their way into his eyes.

 

* * *

 

John was woken up with a chaste kiss and a hand on his forehead, pushing back his hair, and he groggily turned toward Lafayette’s side of the bed,expecting to cuddle up and go back to sleep.

Instead of Lafayette’s quiet morning mumbles, what he heard was the conspiratorial giggling of two people, and it took him a moment to search his mind and place the second laugh, which came from up above him, but it was unmistakably…

“Alex!” John said, his eyes shooting open. He rolled back over, the blanket tangling in his legs. Alex was there, all right, his wide, bright eyes trained on John, an open little smile plastered to his mouth. John latched himself onto him and yanked him down for another smacking kiss, joyful and full and so, _so_ sweet after all this time without tasting him. He sighed into Alex’s mouth and Alex picked up where he’d left off, letting him feel taken for a moment before pulling away.

“Laf made breakfast, baby,” he told him, still smiling, “and if you want to hear about my trip you better get up, because I’m passing out as soon as I eat.”

John hopped out of bed and scurried after them; Lafayette had been watching from the doorway and now he led the way down the hall to the kitchen. There was the same spread of pancakes and eggs there had been yesterday, though this time in higher quantity and with mimosas instead of plain juice.

“This is actually shockingly good, Laf,” Alex said a few minutes later when they were all seated and had eaten through a couple pancakes. “I’m proud of you.”

Lafayette chose to ignore the first part of the comment and beamed at the praise.

“What did you guys do while I was away?” Alex went on. “Did you find ways to occupy yourselves?”

“It was boring here!” John piped up, though not before exchanging a look of agreement with Lafayette. “Tell us about Scotland!”

“You mean the east coast of Scotland? Where nothing happens? Yeah, it was great.” Alex viciously sliced through all three of his remaining pancakes at once and brought all three layers to his mouth. “We did manage to put all the properties up on the market, and the estate should be fully settled by this time next year. Nothing incredibly complicated, I guess. I think the lawyer just needed some next of kin to sign the paperwork, to be honest. And the nice things are twofold - yes, I’m going to come into some money, and now that I know my way around the UK train system, it means I can take you guys there for our next vacation.”

John squealed. “I want to go to Glasgow, though! Ooh, and London. I want to see the cities!”

Lafayette laughed, his mouth still halfway full. “Country boy at heart,” he teased. “You can take the boy out of South Carolina…”

Alex joined in for the crescendo. “But you can’t take South Carolina out of the boy!” They banged on the table with their fists, and John blushed.

“All right, all right,” he said. “You guys have way too much fun with that.”

“It’s not our fault you react in such a becoming way when we point out your -” Lafayette affected a botched, vague southern drawl - “down-home heritage.”

Alex shook his head affectionately. “Time to go back to English class, Lafayette.” Lafayette mimed biting at him as he stood to gather the dishes, and as he carried them to the sink, Alex nudged John and winked at him. “So,” he said, “you take good care of him?”

John blushed again. “I think so,” he said, even though what he meant was not the sort of thing Alex was talking about. “It was hard, without you here. Can we go on a walk later, just you and me?”

Alex leaned over and kissed him soundly, hand around his wrist and pressing down on his pulse point there. “Of course, baby,” he said. John smiled, totally relaxed for what felt like the first time in weeks.

 

* * *

 

Alex lay down on their picnic blanket, breathing the early-summer air deeply into his lungs.

“It’s nice,” he said, and John snuggled closer to him, eager to listen, “to not have to wear a fucking sweater in the springtime.”

John cracked up laughing; Alex shushed him with a kiss to the corner of his mouth, laying his head on his shoulder. “I missed you too, you know. It was hard being so far apart from you guys. I guess I feel like I was floundering till I found Laf and you, and then you guys were suddenly in my life, and I forgot how to do things without the two of you. I’ve always been so self-sufficient - it’s a weird thing to realize.”

“You had a fancy Scottish lawyer helping you, it couldn’t have been that hard.”

Alex laughed. “Yeah. But like, getting on the plane - it was weird to have to sit next to strangers. It was like going back to a life I had before, that I never, ever want to have again.”

John sighed, and Alex made a soft noise of contentment. “I don’t know how you feel about it, but I’m sorry about your Dad.”

Alex scoffed. “The funeral was awkward.” He sat up suddenly. “I kept wishing you guys were there to help me through it. It’s weird - I didn’t think I’d have to grieve this, but now that I’ve been home a few hours I’m realizing I guess I do.”

John sat up and hugged him tightly, looking out over the lights of Manhattan. “Why don’t we come up to the roof more often?”

“You know, I don’t know. It’s a beautiful view,” Alex said, and the way he looked over at John made it clear what he meant.

 

* * *

 

They made their way back in when it got to be too cold, and Alex weaseled his way onto Lafayette’s lap, settling into the cradle of his hips with his back to him.

Lafayette grumbled as Alex wiggled against him. “Little minx,” he growled, reaching down to still Alex’s hips.

Alex just laughed, tipping his head back. John couldn’t help but think about kissing along the column of his neck. “I missed you guys,” Alex said. He quieted his voice to a soft hum - “Baby wants some sugar, daddy.”

Lafayette bucked a bit and Alex laughed again, thoroughly amused. “John,” he said, reaching out for him, and John went. “I’m all starved for attention. You two need to pay attention to me.”

“Yes, sir,” John whispered in reverence, and went to work on his fantasies of marking up Alex’s throat. Lafayette worked at undressing him when John would briefly let up, working Alex’s shirt off and then his sweatpants, rolling the elastic down to expose his low-rise trunks.

“What do you think, John? What should we do with him?” John blinked at Lafayette, holding Alex’s wrists at his sides. It took him a moment, but he chuckled, settled into the role.

“I may have an idea of something he’d like,” he said, and he punctuated it by biting down on Alex’s earlobe. Alex shuddered, and John enjoyed the proximity, the way he could feel his blood coursing through his pulse and see his Adam’s apple bob when he swallowed. Alex’s hair was clean and fresh, and John buried his face in it, and Alex shimmied back against Lafayette. John chuckled and reached down to drive the heel of his hand against his balls, the underside of his cock. It got him hard in no time, pushing and leaking against the fabric of his undies. “Pretty,” John said, tweaking a nipple. “If only you were good like this all the time.”

Alex scoffed, flipped his hair back indignantly. “You wish,” he said.

John chuckled darkly again. “I do. Then I could just worship you. Not worry about keeping you in line.” He breathed hot on Alex’s collarbone, but brushed past it and up to join his lips with Lafayette’s. Laf made a noise of surprise and delight, holding Alex’s hands in front of him while John buried his free hand in Laf’s hair and kissed him deeply. “I love you,” he breathed at him as he pulled away.

He looked down at his other hand’s continued work at Alex’s cock. “God, you _are_ a little slut, aren’t you?” he asked, looking Alex straight in the eye. “What do you want?”

“I want you to… I want…” Alex panted.As much as he’d been trying to hide it before, this was clearly getting to him. John thought he knew what he wanted, but he wanted to hear Alex say it. He tucked his hand into Alex’s shorts and starting playing lightly with the head of his cock, only teasing. Alex mewled helplessly as John swiped some of the precut from his tip and stuck his fingers in his own mouth.

Lafayette cleared his throat. “I believe he asked you what you want, mon amour.” He adjusted his grip on Alex’s wrists so they were held in one of his hands, and reached around to tweak Alex’s nipples. It only served to drive Alex crazy, jumping in Lafayette’s lap and squeaking when he pulled at them a bit too hard.

“I want you both to fuck me,” Alex said finally, his face red, trying to keep his breathing under control. “Want you both so bad, want you both _now.”_

John and Lafayette looked at each other in unspoken agreement for all of a split second before John stood to clear room for Lafayette to scoop Alex up and carry him over his shoulder to the bedroom. John followed them, eyeing the unobstructed view of Alex’s perfectly rounded ass, the way his underwear stretched across each of his cheeks. He wanted to take him apart, slowly like he’d promised, make him beg and forget everything but his name. Well, his name, and maybe Lafayette’s.

“You wanna be naughty?” he asked, moving to straddle Alex as soon as Lafayette tossed him on the bed. He sat just below Alex’s chest and played with the zipper on his jeans, teasing. Alex’s arms were up above him, and Lafayette got busy binding them to the headboard with cuffs before he could make use of them.

Alex panted up at him, blushing from his cheeks to his chest. John couldn’t resist running his fingertips softly down his inner arms, where he knew him to be ticklish; Alex laughed and thrashed, trying to get out, but the handcuffs clanged against the wrought iron of the bed frame. John grinned. “Just where I want you. You might as well let it happen, sweetheart.”

After allowing himself just a few more moments of studying Alex, he came to a decision. “Laf’s gonna get your ass ready while you suck my cock,” he said. “And I expect you to be good about it, don’t slack off. I know what that mouth is capable of.” He tapped Alex’s cheek with his palm, just enough to sting, and felt Lafayette - God bless him for taking John’s lead - climb into position behind them. “Now,” he said, regarding Alex, “open up. Stick your tongue out.”

Alex did so, staring straight up at John as John undid his pants and pushed them down on his hips. Lafayette made a point of throwing Alex’s underwear forward, over John’s shoulder, and they landed up by Alex’s head. There was a growl, and John laughed when Alex squeaked; Lafayette must have dove right in. He stroked his cock a few times as he brought it out, enjoying the way Alex salivated as he brought it closer to him, propping himself up on his knees close to Alex’s face for leverage “In your mouth,” he said, and without ceremony he was hissing, enveloped in the wet heat Alex offered.

Alex swallowed him down without warning, accepting him into the back of his tight throat, and swallowed around him. John let out a gasp, followed by a low moan, and felt Alex snicker around him, the quick puffs of breath just above his thatch of pubic hair where Alex’s nose was buried into his skin. “Don’t get smug, now,” he warned him, “get him all good and fucked out, Lafayette. I wanna hear him beg as best he can around my cock.”

He chanced a look back and what he saw was incredible - Lafayette’s big hands curled around Alex’s hip and thigh on either side respectively, pushing one leg up for access and holding him still, his eyes closed as he worked his mouth between the cheeks of Alex’s ass. John gasped again when Alex made a little move with his tongue, swirling it around the head. Unable to help himself, he started movement, honeyed-slow, letting Alex feel everything he gave him.

John had this habit of babbling. “God, I’m gonna fuck you until you can’t take anymore, and then I’m gonna have Lafayette fuck you, baby. How does that sound? You want to be all worn out and used up by us? You want us to take our pleasure from you and leave you here to take care of yourself? Maybe we shouldn’t even let you come, maybe we should - aah, Alex, fuck, just like that. Yeah.”

The moment Alex wrenched his mouth away from John’s cock was the exact same moment Lafayette flipped him onto his back, moving up to pin John to the bed, breathless. Before he knew it, Alex was looming above him - and when had he switched places with him, his hands now cuffed up above him? This wasn’t fair.

“That was a fun interlude,” Alex said, trailing his fingers along John’s chest, “but maybe it’s best you keep that little fantasy of yours of dominating me to the phone, love.” He leaned down to whisper this in John’s ear, and John tried to parse the situation, tried to organize it in his mind - Lafayette was taking off his pants, then his boxers, but Alex was sucking at sensitive spots on his neck like a leech, little sharp teeth sunk into the thin skin, and it was very distracting.

“Don’t get me wrong,” Alex continued, closer now - John could barely see, he was so aroused, but he could feel him, his hair draping across his shoulder, his stubble being nuzzled into the wet skin of his neck - “I still want you to fuck me, Jack. I just don’t need your assistance to make that happen.” He straddled John, now, lying his head on John’s chest and arching so his butt was in the air. “Lafayette, baby, keep eating me out. You’re soooo good at it. His cock’s all hard for me, but I want to take my time and enjoy your mouth.”

Alex spent the next few minutes being driven crazy by Laf’s talented mouth. John could tell because he became increasingly aggressive; he stuttered, “F-fuck, shit” when Lafayette sunk a finger in beside his tongue, pounded on the bed beside John when he added another, and by the time Laf was playing with Alex’s balls, he was babbling that maybe Lafayette should fuck him first.

“As much as I’d love to,” Laf said, finally pulling away and patting his ass lovingly, “I think John _really_ misses you.” He emphasized this by stroking John base to tip, just once, and John jolted with the sudden attention.

“Mmmm,” Alex said noncommittally. He wiggled his hips on the way down and positioned himself above John, reaching back to grab his dick and guide it inside him. "God,” he said, through labored breaths, “you’re so hot.” He leaned down and kissed at John’s collar, his voice rumbling against John’s chest. “I missed you so much, baby. Wanted you the whole time. Couldn’t stop thinking about this.” He circles his hips to clarify - perfect control, Alex is _so_ perfect, John thinks as he tips his head back and moans.

“I love you,” he says, finding himself unable to enunciate much more, “I love you, Alex, I love you.” Gasping as Alex starts moving in earnest, he’s well-distracted when Lafayette moves to the side of them, and jolts when he starts pushing John’s sweaty hair back from his forehead. John catches his palm with his lips as he swirls it down to trace his jaw, kisses up his fingertips then down to his wrist. “I love you,” he says, and he thinks - the way Lafayette holds his gaze even through his lids gone heavy with lust, the way he pauses in touching him - that Lafayette understands it’s meant for him, and just how deeply it’s meant.

Alex huffs, clearly put out by the lack of attention suddenly being paid to him. He sinks down hard on John, stubborn, and Lafayette laughs at his antics and leans forward to kiss him. Alex melts a little, slows down a little, and John chokes back a sob, desperately wanting to be able to reach out and touch him, wrap his  hands around Alex’s waist, feel the muscles in his core work as he drives into his body from below. He wants to touch Lafayette, smooth skin shining with a thin sheen of sweat. He wants to devour them both.

Alex lets out a soft whine and breaks away from Lafayette, and Laf pushes Alex back till they’re disconnected, Alex laid out on his back. Alex sqirms, trying to shimmy his hips back onto John’s cock and get it back inside him, but all it does is rub against John, his cock swollen and wet with lube. He lets out a long, low moan and shifts frantically, chasing the friction Alex is giving him, but it’s not enough.

Lafayette pushes Alex aside, and he rolls, gets up on his hands and knees so John has a perfect view - but only for a second before he crawls over to John to once again look at him from up above. He strokes John’s hair, then leans in for a kiss, and John finds it is as pleasurable as Alex fucking himself on his cock had been moments before - it is a full-bodied kiss, full of want and appreciation, and Alex is moaning so softly that only John can hear it, and he feels privileged for this fact.

There’s a hot puff of air across the underside of John’s cock, and he pulls away to look down - Alex looks down too. Lafayette has gotten himself in the same position he’d been in to eat Alex out at first, hands wrapped around John’s hips, pushing his thighs up so he plants his feet on the bed, thumbs digging into the flesh of his ass. “I have to taste both of you,” he says, and licks a stripe up John’s cock - John _howls_ , and Alex chuckles, still absently stroking his hair.

But Lafayette drops his mouth lower, pushing John’s legs up a bit more. John goes, feeling boneless and pliant, and unable to protest vocally even if he wanted to. Lafayette’s tongue slips across his opening a few times before entering him, slowly, carefully, and John makes a couple of small noises that Alex shushes with his own fingers pushed past John’s lips. Lafayette works methodically at him, lubing up his fingers once more to sink one in and move it around inside him - John’s had this done to him few enough times that he still finds the intrusion uncomfortable, foreign, so he shifts his hips to adjust as best he can and is reward for it with another finger going past the tight ring of muscle. Now Lafayette pulls his fingers apart inside him, and John can feel his tongue between them, lapping at his walls, relaxing him even through his slight, habitual panic. He tries to open his body again, tries to relax his arms and his legs; Alex notices the tension leave his chest and smiles at him, a praise all its own. John smiles back, and before long Lafayette is fitting another thick finger into him.

And then - it has _never_ felt like this, John would swear before judge and jury. He has never felt _that,_ that spark of sensation, the feeling urgent and excruciating, and Lafayette just rocks his fingers into that spot again, and when John’s reaction is the same - crying out, yanking at the cuffs, throwing his legs up further in his body’s unconscious plea for more - he vaguely feels Lafayette’s laughing breath ghost against him as he pulls back just slightly.

“Did you find his prostate?” Alex asks, and John would love to swear at him, slap him upside the head for distracting them. _Of course he found it, you idiot,_ he’d say, _what else could it be?_ But Lafayette presses up on it again, this time rubbing the pads of two fingers in slow circles against it, and John can’t say a word. He lies there, panting, begging wordlessly, tears at the corners of his eyes.

“Kind of a disappointment that he won’t come inside me,” Alex says, and John’s brain does some aerobics, trying to figure out a way they can make that happen without stopping this, “but I’d love to see him shoot off with just your fingers. He looks so hot, Lafayette, baby, don’t you think?”

“Mmmmm,” Lafayette affirms. His thumb is brushing lightly against John’s premium, massaging his prostate from the outside even as his index and middle fingers attack it directly. And it is an attack, the most efficient way to render John incapacitated, he thinks. Nobody has touched his dick in what feels like hours and he can feel himself getting close, the pressure coiling so unbearably tight in his belly, his muscles clamping down on Lafayette to get him to stay right where he is, maybe forever -

“God, look at him, baby,” is the last thing he hears before his hearing blows out. His vision goes white, his movement is out of his control, all sense of feeling besides Lafayette inside him, surrounding him, fading away.

Alex is kissing him softly when he comes back to Earth, and it takes him a moment but once he blinks his eyes open he realizes Alex has come, too, his dick back to half-hard, a distinct mess dripping down his side even as his own coats his abdomen just below his chest. His own cock is jumping weakly, because Lafayette is still -

“Ah, Lafayette,” John whines, nudging Alex away with his chin. “Stop, I’m -”

“Not finished yet,” Lafayette breathes back, and he starts making circles in the opposite direction, and John doesn’t know why that’s what does it but he feels the unmistakable pull of another orgasm, his mind protesting vehemently to the possibility of such a thing even as his body chases it with absolute conviction.

Alex has pulled one of his thighs up so he can watch Lafayette work from above, and John reminds himself to blush over what must be his view later. He comes again with a shout, his cock leaping and giving whatever’s left, running down its own length in slow waves as the intensity ebbs out through his core, to his limbs, to his extremities and finally he can sigh and collapse back and swim back to clarity.

Lafayette only teases the possibility of working him up all over again for another moment before he pulls his fingers out, wiping them unceremoniously on John’s hip. John jots down another mental note, this one to complain about that. Alex skates his hands up John’s arms to the cuffs, touches his wrists and then releases him; John is too exhausted to move, so he stays where he is as Alex wraps himself around him, legs first then arms, surrounding him. Alex is overwarm, sweaty, sticky. John shifts to let Lafayette clean them up in the gaps he can get at; he assumes his belly will still be somewhat coated in lube and drying come, but he can shower later. After all, they have all the time in the world.

 

* * *

 

“Are you ready, amour?” Lafayette calls from the hallway.

John takes a final, nervous look around the room. In truth, he’s packed everything he’d been able to reasonably think he’d need - and a few extras, much to Alex’s annoyance.

“You’re taking my pillowcase?” he’d asked two days prior, his face scrunching up in mild disgust. “At least let me wash it.”

“No!” John had gone over and took it from him, folding it with care and placing it back in his suitcase. “That’s the - that’s the point,” he’d grumbled, and Alex had taken his chin in his hand and given him a soft kiss before going to the hall closet to do up the bedclothes properly again.

John slams his suitcase shut, deciding that it’s not like there aren’t any stores where they’re going. He checks himself out in the mirror and plasters his best grin to his face before heading out into the living area, where Lafayette is hugging Alex to him from behind, Alex rocked back on his heels, letting Lafayette support his weight. Lafayette kisses Alex’s temple and Alex giggles, then separates them, coming over to John to wrap his arms around his waist and hug him tight.

John lets his hand go to Alex’s ass, squeezes. Alex gasps. “You’ll behave while we’re away?” he growls in Alex’s ear.

Alex blushes - John will never get over how easy it is to make him blush - and flutters his eyelashes at him. “I can’t promise I won’t miss you guys too much. But I’ve got a whole toy box to help me out.”

John brightens. “You’ll have to give those of us who miss it a replay the moment we return. Lafayette, my love,” he says - and it feels good, to say that and not feel a tinge of question in it - and he pulls Laf in for a side hug, walking together to the door. “Ready for our California adventure?”

Lafayette laughs. “I can’t wait to see your sunburn, mon amour.” John swats his shoulder, and Alex watches them each gather up their bags, leaning against the wall.

“Don’t get too cold here,” John tells him.

Alex smirks. “Leave! You two are gonna miss your flight.”

Lafayette gives Alex a smacking kiss and then heads out toward the elevator. John looks around for a moment more, then settles his eyes on Alex, who looks so comfy in his sweats and John’s worn-out t-shirt that John momentarily wants to curl up with him and sleep for the rest of the day instead of going on this vacation. It must show on his face, because Alex says, “What?”

“I knew I forgot something,” John says, and he steps closer to Alex - and he’s struck by how much it is still like their first kiss, every time, the way Alex lets out a tiny gasp and his eyes go heavy-lidded in the presence of John, feeling the heat radiate off his body and invite him in.

He kisses the smirk the rest of the way off Alex’s face and leaves him with nothing more than a shared, meaningful look that speaks volumes.

_You’ll be here when I get back?_

_Yes, John. I’ll always be the home you can return to._


End file.
